The View From Wisconsin

Just a random set of rants from a Sports Fan from Wisconsin.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Proposed Written Diabetes Test

AMERICAN DIABETES ASSOCIATION

PROPOSED WRITTEN DIABETES TEST

To each question, simply answer "yes" or "no" if you have ever done any of the following during your lifetime:

1. Drank at least a 12-ounce (355 mL) Coca-Cola, Mountain Dew, Pepsi-Cola or other carbonated beverage with high fructose corn syrup?

2. Eaten any brand of potato chip, such as Lays, Ruffles, Jays or other flavors/brands?

3. Had a "super-sized" meal at any major national fast food chain, such as McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, Carl's Jr./Hardee's, Jack In The Box, A&W or Taco Bell?

4. Eaten any brand or type of tortilla chips, such as Chi-Chi's, Tostitos, Doritos, or Fritos?

5. Drank a sports drink or sugary beverage, such as Kool-Aid, Gatorade, Powerade, or Sweetened Ice Tea?

6. Eaten a chocolate bar or chocolate candy, such as Hershey's, Nestle's, M&M's, Godiva, Dove Bar, or Fannie Farmer?

7. Eaten any cheese puffs or curls, such as Cheetos?

8. Eaten any ice cream (like Haagen-Dazs, Breyers, Dairy Queen or Tastee-Freeze) or ice cream product (such as a Popsicle, Dreamsicle, Eskimo Pie, Ice cream sandwich, Dilly Bar)?

9. Eaten a pizza or any other Italian entrée?

10. Eaten a Twinkie or other processed snack cake, such as a Ding Dong, Cupcake, Little Debbie, Zingers or otherwise?

Scoring:

Give yourself one point for each time you said "yes".

If your score was one or more, YOU'RE A DIABETIC! Get to the doctor NOW to get on insulin!


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Obviously, this isn't a real test. However, with the way doctors seem to be bent on getting us all to lower our blood sugar, this one might become reality sooner than we'd like to admit...